A friend’s cock instead. And very nice he is too.
Since I’ve posted a couple of latex images on my public Instagram I’ve been asked about what it’s like to wear latex.
Latex is a true material of contrasts. When you first order latex clothes and tear open the envelope you notice two things.
1. They’re heavier than you think
2. They’re not shiny.
Unless you artificially shine latex up it’s very dull and quite powdery.
A little effort though and it shines like you wouldn’t believe.
Personally my favoured method is to use a product called Vivishine to give it that initial all over shine, but then to maintain the shine through the night you will need the occasional spray top up so I use a silicon oil based spray in a small bottle.
As for wearing, well the first thing to note is that it’s cold and quite clammy to wear. Depending on how shiny you have it, it can also be slimy to the touch, but it is very smooth and extremely touchable.
Anotherthing you notice is you need a bag or locker to carry/store your phone, keys and wallet. Pockets on latex are usable, but decorative art best. Anything you put in them ends up all oily which means if you take photos with your phone during the night it’s important to make sure you have a way to clean your lens.It’s also very important to remember that if you catch latex on anything sharp it will rip very badly, although it is repairable (not quite so if it’s chlorinated).
I often wear latex jeans with an Oxford shirt because that way you gain a single pocket. It’s handy especially where your phone has a six and a half inch screens for shoes/boots; I often wear patent leather shoes for a similar shine, although the shirt above matches my new rocks in colour perfectly. If wearing new rocks with latex though, remember to always put sellotape over the buckles that are up inside the jeans. If they catch from the inside they will put small holes in the rubber.
I forgot that Garth wore a Video Toaster t-shirt towards the end of the film.
Since September last year I’ve lost 25kg in weight, starting at a rather hefty 113kg with a 50″ chest and 42″ waist, and looking like this:
To a rather svelte 38″ waist, with this general appearance…
There have been no miracle diets. No stupid low carb roles, no starvation. Just a massive cut down on the amount of fat I’m eating, and a little reduction in sugars. I’m not watching my weight as such; I’m just not being a dick.
The problem I’ve now had however, is my stage suits – of which I own rather a lot! I’ve had to buy new ones. The grey/blue one above being a very cheap but very nice intermediate suit from Matalan.
Last week then, I headed out to Meadowhall to get a new suit to add to the one above.
The problem, of course, with Meadowhall is the glitz and the glam of the place get you, and then you become spend blind. Indeed, by the time i had done I had the two beautiful suits below and £270 less in the bank. Even with a big sale on! The darker suit was 50% off (but the material is absolutely gorgeous!).
Along with the new latex outfit I also bought a few weeks ago which are much smaller, I’ve now made a big commitment to not being fat again. I don’t think I can afford to! Suits and latex are very pricey.
I’m now a 36 to 38 waist (36 if the trousers are a regular fit, 38 if they are slim fit) and I’m getting quite comfortable with my size now. I think I’ll probably try and get down to 80kg and stay around there.
Sadly, the closure of Maplins has left me somewhat sad, however, I did visit the Sheffield Central branch just before it closed and procure a load of ex display and reduced stuff.
This little rehearsal PA will be great for smaller pub gigs as well – it’s only 140 watts but actually sounds pretty good even when cranked to a decent volume. It’s a shame that, even though it looks it, it’s not actually stereo – speakers A and B are just the same blended mono channel. It’s also got absolutely no monitoring facility or auxilliary, but it does have a rather decent reverb engine built in which doesn’t sound too “pubby”. It even takes an MP3 USB stick and comes with a remote.
The other thing I got was a UHF radio mike system. Again, same make, so not exactly Shure SM58 quality, but decent enough for the folk band to use should we need to.